Remember being a first-time mum? You were hell bent on doing ‘the right thing’ by your child.
Often this meant altering your lifestyle to make sure they drank, ate, slept when they were ‘supposed to’.
I was one of these mum’s who would schedule my day around nap time to make sure No.1 slept.
It did help as No.1 is a great sleeper.
Things have changed dramatically as I’ve ventured longer into motherhood. I have become WAY more relaxed. Perhaps in some cases a little to casual to those looking in from the outside.
But it’s a coping mechanism I think, and a bloody good one.
Here’s a few things I have become more relaxed about:
I used to peel, slice or dice an apple before giving to my babies. Now I hand them an entire apple, it keeps them amused for longer.
If they don’t eat, I don’t care. This is not always true, for example if I know they’re going to get hungry when we’re out and about and it will cost me an arm and a leg, I’ll insist they eat before we go.
I used to make sure I was home around sleep times. I didn’t want to break their night time routine and I was adamant they had day sleeps.
Now I try to keep them awake if it’s going to help me get some peace when I need it, and if day sleeps happen they do, if not, it means I’ll get to have a wine earlier, I mean get them to bed earlier at night.
I used to worry at every scrap and bump, now unless it’s bleeding a lot or a bump is more than 3mm high, I just kiss it better instead of stressing out. How much they cry is also a good indicator.
Stubbed toes now are just part of the territory and nothing to get upset about.
In fact falling over, banging their heads on the floor and tripping over fresh air, can probably be attributed to the fact that they have an uncoordinated mum. I never used to be, only since I had children.
Every toy had to be picked up at hourly intervals throughout the day. I used to be constantly tidying my house.
Now there’s enough toys on my floor to create an obstacle course for my children. This also helps their motor skills, but also contributes to the number of falls and trips my children have.
However, it’s the getting up that counts right??
I can now go to bed with washing in the basket, dishes in the sink and with the lounge strewn with toys.
Handing over my baby
When I first had No.1 I was VERY reluctant to hand her over for cuddle’s, especially when she was little, just in case they weren’t as careful as I would want them to be. I was only ok with my own parents having cuddle’s.
I also didn’t want their germs all over her and I was also worried when other people looked after my kids, just in case they didn’t do it the way I did.
With No.2 I’ll pass him over to anyone who asks, I’ll then ask if they mind looking after him if need to go somewhere.
And as for babysitting, if anyone offered I would have no hesitation of going out to drink wine.
The biggest change is that I’ve realised there is no right or wrong way to do things.
I no longer have an opinion on what others do with their kids like I did before I had kids, and when I was a newbie mum. I am not Super mum.
We all do the best we can, and before judging I think it pays to try to put yourselves in someone else’s shoes – just for one day.
And even if that’s not how you’d do it – well tough – it’s not your life so butt out!