Hands up if the second you feel a niggle in your throat you immediately grab your phone and Google ‘sore throat’ or ‘how to make a sore throat go away’, and then immediately turn to whoever is in the vicinity and yell out “OMG Google says I may have throat cancer!!!!!”
Slight exaggeration? Perhaps. But if you are anything like me, motherhood has only exacerbated your inner hypochondriac. I often wonder how mother’s survived before Google. Are we really better off having access to Doctor Google or are we just freaking ourselves out?
When we had Baby Number One there there are a lot of things we experienced. This had me reeling with excitement and also worrying about everything. Enter Mr Doctor Google! It was my first breastfeeding experience and there were so many things I hadn’t even heard of that Dr Google has enlightened me on.
For example:
Me: ‘Is it normal for a breastfed baby to poop so much wholegrain mustard?’
Doctor Google: YES! Now here is a visual slideshow of what baby poop should look like…
Me: Gross – I don’t need to see that.
Me: ‘Is it normal for my nipples to feel like they are going to explode and feel sore during breastfeeding?’
Google Doctor: YES! Now deal with it, because it will be like this for a few months. And here is a list of normal and freaky alternative therapies to help heal your trashed nipples.
Me: Frantically making a list of the best nipple creams and gel pads.
Then there was the time when I was lovingly sat with my daughter and suddenly a whole lot of gunk projectiled out of her mouth,. Sick all over the place. I hadn’t seen so much projectile vomit since watching Pitch Perfect and Aubreys vomit scene. I turned to Doctor Google to see if there was anything i could do to help with a projectile vomiting daughter.
Of course Dr Google came back with all sorts of scary acronyms like GERD and GORD. When in reality maybe the little one had decided to decorate the place with projectile vomit because something had disagreed with her tummy.
I have googled rashes on children, breathing problems, bumps and bruises. Such an array of things over the years.
That got me thinking – I’ve lost count of the amount of times I have Googled a symptom. Doctor Google has told me in the past that I have a terminal illness, cancer and I would be dead in 6 weeks. so I’d say perhaps it’s best that i relax a bit with the medical searches and just leave it to the professionals, and perhaps I should leave my Googling to ‘What’s the best stain remover to get sick out of bedding’ Or even better ‘Where is the nearest local spa’. It’s time for daddy day care to give me a break.
